So why is it so difficult to create change in our own lives or deal with a tough situation? Life isn’t so hard so perhaps we are just hard on ourselves? For years, I have followed the works of Ram Dass that taught me to: “Be Here Now”. A simple notion, but one that pushes us to concentrate on the now versus the “what could be” or what “might have been”.
How Do We Cope?
As I too have experienced great hardships through my own personal divorce, I used music and dance to get me through those tough times. I always knew that night followed day, sunrise followed sunset, and the seasons came and went in a normal, natural way. I was a believer that if you planted your seeds in rich fertile ground, and watered it, fed it with total love and patience, you would have the results. Weeding was needed along the journey and so I pulled those out as I went so that I would continue to see a labor of love and the results would be fabulous.
So I share my simple yet effective insights so you can go through one of the most painful things that can occur in your life such as a divorce.
Play music, dance and begin to heal your soul. When you are able to truly lose yourself in something other than your own thoughts, you can experience a feeling of traveling through time and surrender into the feelings but without as much emotion as previously felt. Your mind begins to take a wider broader view on the world around you- and all without you realizing it!
I left my sadness and received the most insurmountable love for myself. It was liberating and such a feeling of freedom. So when you go through changes and challenges and feel there’s no way out, pick out something you love and play it loud! It will help get you through your toughest times.
So what was the lesson I learned from this big experience? I can create the CHANGE I wish to see.
My suggestion is for you to reach out to the people that make you feel safe.
Find something to do that you love. This doesn’t mean you’re running away from problems but that you need to concentrate on tasks and situations that make you feel good when things around you feel challenging.
Ideas That Generate Feel Good Moments:
- Write it down: I always found it helpful to journal my feelings. No one is going to read these words so just get your own thoughts on paper. It truly helps clear the cobwebs and the mind.
- Exercise: Even a brisk walk around the block can ease tension and a sour stomach.
- Eat healthy: Look in your refrigerator right now. Pick ONE item you would eat and look up recipes online that can be prepared with items already in your possession.
- Meditate: Important point to make, don’t meditate on images that create pain in your mind. Start with a favorite memory as a child or even a future vacation site you wish to visit.
- Go to the movies: See something funny.
- Buy a set of chimes: I’ve gone out and bought chimes so that I hear beautiful music right from my backdoor.
- Go to the beach, park or forest and just “BE.”
Going through challenges of Divorce especially after 60? Call me, and let’s talk.